Tony DiNozzo: Competent Agent, Frat Boy or something else?

[webbgirl]

After watching the past couple of seasons of NCIS in rapid succession, I had this post forming on Tony's character and his growth, or lack thereof.  I kept debating on whether to actually post it or not, then I saw a couple of spoilers for upcoming episodes In the upcoming episode Knockout (6.18) we're promised more info on Tony's background.  The writers (or producers can't remember which) also promised that we'll get lots of angsty info in the season finale on Tony. I'm personally hoping for some background that shows us why he reverts to the frat boy mentality and womanizer when things get too 'real' or uncomfortable for him.
Anyway, my post is more about Tony as a good agent than it is about other stuff.  Through all the seasons of NCIS we get glimpses of Tony being a really good investigator and having great instincts.  Unfortunately, these moments tend to be eclipsed by his goofing around or his attempts to show off for Gibbs. 

I'm going to lose my Gibbs/DiNozzo slasher card for this, but I think that him being around Gibbs is the problem.  I also think this is somewhat intentional on the writers parts. When we see Tony in charge of a situation (rather than following Gibbs' lead) we get to see his analytical skills and leadership capabilities. 

This is even evidenced in "Bait" when Tony has to take over when Gibbs ends up in the classroom with the kid. We also see it in "In The Zone" when Tony and Nikki (sp?) go to Baghdad.  Once they're in Baghdad, Tony was the epitome of a seasoned investigator.

Back to "Bait" though.  One of the things this episode highlighted for me was Tony's willingness to stand up to Jenny when he professionally disagreed with her.  He stood up to her in a way I don't think we've ever seen him stand up to Gibbs.  I don't think it was out of a lack of respect, but it felt more like him claiming his place as 'Senior Field Agent'.  It demonstrated it clearer than all of the times he's spouted the words to Ziva and McGee.

Question is, why has Tony never been able to stand up to Gibbs the way he stood up to Jenny?  When Gibbs returned to NCIS and essentially brushed Tony back into his place, Tony bowed back into his spot and deferred to Gibbs.  I know that they showed the awkwardness of the transition, but I felt like it was mostly played for laughs.  Though, I found the part of him turning down his own team for the sake of watching out for Gibbs heartbreaking.  Again though, he was able to be honest with Jenny about it.  I think if he'd been dealing with Gibbs in a similar situation he would have just played it off and made a joke.

My fondest desire for this season is that we finally get to really see Tony coming into his own, even when he's around Gibbs.  And that we get to see some honest acknowledgment that he's not just the comic relief.  I think it would be a natural outgrowth of what happened with Jeanne and Jenny.  Situations like that are either going to break someone or make them stronger in the long run.  I'd love to watch the process of the latter with Tony.

Any thoughts or comments from everyone else on this?

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_tweeter_/]

I'm not a shipper at all, but I prefer the relationship he had with Paula.

I will never forgive the writers for killing her off. Mysogonistic boys club - I can't even spell it, I'm so pissed.

[tejas.livejournal.com]

Oh, my OTP is Gibbs/Tony. :-):-) I don't see him with any of the women on the show at all.

[captain-tiv.livejournal.com]

I really liked Tony and Paula together, I loved him and Jeanne together. He loved her.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_tweeter_/]

I don't think he did love her. I think he got used to being with her, he became comfortable, and since he hadn't been in a relationship with one woman for so long that he's mistaking routine with love. Jeanne, as portrayed onscreen, is the type of woman he would normally run from - needy, manipulative - but he had to stay with her, so he got used to her ways.

There's an interesting conversation on TWoP where a person suggests that Tony needs approval and reassurance, etc., and if he were on an undercover op where he got something like that, say, with a father-figure who treated him like a son, encouraging and praising him, we might never get him back from the op.

[captain-tiv.livejournal.com]

I think he did get used to being with her, but given how he quit flirting with other females and, at the end, was wondering about marriage and kids (shown in the episode following the one where Jeanne left), I think he didn't realize he'd fallen in love with her until he had already fell. I think he's tried to convince himself that it was all part of the op, but I think there's more to it than even he knows.

[tejas.livejournal.com]

I think he knew he'd fallen in love with her when he showed up at her door crying. I don't think that was him in his DiNardo persona. I think *that* was Tony.

Now, would he have ever gotten to that point with her if he hadn't been on the op? Doubtful. I think there were a number of incidents like the whole "my ex is stalking me but it's none of your business" thing that would have sent him packing rather than trying to get her to work through it. Not to mention the house thing.

[captain-tiv.livejournal.com]

He took Paula's advice to heart. He knew that he could be killed at any moment, just like Gibbs said. He didn't want to leave this world without telling Jeanne how he felt, IMHO. He wasn't just crying because of Paula, I don't think.

[tejas.livejournal.com]

No. Paula was just part of it. It was Paula, and his guilt for not saving her, and Kate, and anyone else he's ever lost before, and the future he wanted, but knew he probably could never have with Jeanne - but he had to try and he had to say it and it cost him dearly.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_tweeter_/]

I'm not sure about that. I think he was extremely vulnerable and emotional after losing Paula, a woman who he had a "thing" with and who became a friend. I believe he "thought" he loved Jeanne, but he didn't really. (Okay, I hated Jeanne, but I swear that's not why I believe this).

Now, your last paragraphs is dead on. If he was just dating the woman and didn't have to stick around no matter what, her behavior with her ex and the whole panic-stricken phone call because her place was going condo IN A MONTH... then going from sharing an apartment to BUYING A HOUSE... well, Tony would've been gone in a heartbeat.

[tejas.livejournal.com]

Thinking he loved Jeanne and actually loving Jeanne is pretty much the same thing. Until such time as *he* decides he really didn't love her (and remember, in my perfect world, he and Gibbs have been gettin' it on since pre-series ;-) he did, actually, love her. It's one of those things that only the person involved can truly quantify. I haven't seen anything in Tony's words or behavior to lead me to believe he didn't love her. He may not any more. Internal Affairs may have put paid to that, though I don't think so. I think it just made a bigger mess. I think his reaction to McGee's taunt the other night wouldn't have been so strong had he not loved her.

[captain-tiv.livejournal.com]

And what if Jeanne comes back?

::plot bunnies are hopping::

[tejas.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure he'd ever take her back. The fact that she ran off with the expectation that if he loved her he'd ditch his life and follow her probably threw up a permanent block to any relationship they might have been able to salvage. That was petty, at best. Childish and manipulative at worst. *She* would need to do some serious groveling and I don't think she can.

[captain-tiv.livejournal.com]

That would make a really great missing scene, you know? Find out what was going on during that time.

[tejas.livejournal.com]

It just hit me that Jeanne is who Tony might have been. She'd had everything pretty much handed to her. Yeah, she had to work hard to get through medical school, I'll give her that. She also was, apparently, a good doctor in that she cared about her patients. I'll give her that, too. But she was spoiled rotten on a personal level. Had Tony had a better childhood (and how sad is it that the arms dealer was likely a far better father to her than Tony's father was to him) and followed in his father's footsteps, he might have ended up just as spoiled and childish.

[captain-tiv.livejournal.com]

I wonder what would have happened if the op had gone on much longer.

[tejas.livejournal.com]

There's a nice bunny for someone.

[captain-tiv.livejournal.com]

Tony told Jeanne's old boyfriend that he couldn't live a lie.

I'm willing to bet that if the op had gone on much longer, Tony would have told her who he was. Granted, he might have had to come up with a story like, "I was undercover when I met you, and I couldn't break cover" without mentioning dear old dad.

The question is what would Jeanne have done? :: pets the plot bunny ::

[tejas.livejournal.com]

I think so, too. I don't think he would have been able to pull off living with her for long without saying something. I'm sure his cover was deep, but was it *that* deep? And she strikes me as the type who would arrange to "accidentally" become pregnant when she decided she was ready, if he agreed or not. That would have been a serious clusterfuck for Tony. Not so much that he would have regretted having a child, just having one under those conditions.